How to convince someone to see a counsellor

She needs help

Despite all the enlightenment, mental health is still underrated. Only one in three people suffering from a mental health issue get proper diagnosis. The worse part is the social stigma associated with the mental health issues. This hinders the people that we love from seeing a proper counsellor, even when you are tired of convincing them that they should. Although, in many cases, they don’t need to see one, but if any of the following symptoms persist, they should definitely see one. Let’s see what these symptoms are:

8 Signs that your loved one needs to see a counsellor

1. Constant Stress

Constant-StressIf you undergo stress every once in a while, that’s absolutely normal. Stress is our body’s way of making sure that you give your best when you need it the most. However, the stress that comes with a mental health issue is of a different kind. It simply refuses to go away, thus making it impossible for you to function as a normal human being. This kind of stress might result in frequent tiredness, insomnia, and anxiety. If that’s the kind of stress your loved one suffering from, you need to look its underlying reason, which is something that a counsellor can help you with.

2. Sadness doesn’t go away

Sadness doesn't go awaySadness is just one of the shades of life. Happiness is a counterpoint to it. Most of us feel happy or sad depending upon the situations in our lives, or sometimes we feel this feelings for no specific reasons. But, when the feeling of sadness stays there permanently and simply refuses to go away, it could be a sign of depression. Since depressed people tend to have a different brain composition when compared to normal people, you need to look into the matter. Visiting a counsellor in such a case is absolutely necessary.

3. People find them tiring

People find them tiringThere are a lot of us who simply refuse to acknowledge that they suffer from any type of mental health issue. They would never admit the overwhelming stress and sadness that they are suffering from but would subconsciously convey the same emotions to the people around them. Either they would talk too much or would talk only about negative or superficial things. Therefore, everyone around them would find them tiring. This takes a special toll on their near and dear ones.

4. Uncontrollable emotions

Uncontrollable emotionsWe, as humans, don’t possess a complete control over our emotions. Even in ancient Greek mythology it is said that emotions are given to us by the gods. This is true for everyone of us, but especially for the people suffering from mental health issues. They not only tend to show extremely intense emotions, but violent mood swings as well. In addition, they rarely exprience the calm state of mind, which most of us take for granted as our natural state of mind.

5. Substance abuse or drug addiction

Substance abuseA lot of times drug addiction and substance abuse have a hidden cause behind them. We instinctively use them to cope up with our mental health issues. All these seem to offer a temporary relief from the problem that is bothering us, so we get hooked onto them. However, these don’t provide us with a solution and they ultimiately make it impossible for us to function properly in our society.

Seeing a counsellor in such  a case would not only help us in giving up the addiction but might also help us in tackling our mental health issues in a more meaningful way. They would show us how by becoming more aware of our disease, how we can prevent it from becoming worse and thus function properly in our society.

7. Temper issues

Temper issuesMore often than not, a bad temper has other psychological issues behind it. This need not be a mental health issue, it could also be problem in any of your relationsihp that you can’t confront in a straightforward way. The problem inherant in the unconfronted issues might ultimately cause friction in your day-to-day life, and so it might be causing significant temper issues. Since it is so difficult for us to detect such thought patterns, we must see a counsellor if that is the case.

8. Suicidal thoughts

Suicidal thoughtsThere are a lot of us who can significantly disguise our feelings. Nevertheless, there are some signs and symptoms that we simply fail to hide. Quite often when you hear about someone’s suicide, you hear people saying that ‘Oh! That person seemed perfectly fine to me. I couldn’t even imagine he would do something like that.’ This is because that person was successfully able to hide what was going on in his life. That is why you need to be especially aware whenever someone we know talks (even jokingly) about suicde as it could be a sign of a some bigger problem, which a good counsellor might help them in discovering.

How to convince someone to see a counsellor

Once you are sure that the person whom you love is suffering one or more symptoms mentioned above, you should take them to a counsellor without delay. If they are understanding enough, they would definitely follow your suggestion. But, if they show some resistance to your suggestion, you need to be more tactful when giving the suggestion the second time. Doing that too often would make them feel that you think that they are mad. So, you should follow the following steps while doing that:

1. Listen to them

Listen to themThe worst part of mental health issues is that they make people feel isolated. Everyone behaves with such a person in such a way that makes them convinced that ‘They think that I’m mad.’ If you are straightaway suggest seeing a counsellor to a person who thinks like that, they would start beliving that you too are like the others.

Remember, no one likes to be thought of as a madman. It’s our social stigma that makes us think of mental health issues and madness in the same vein. To tackle someone like that, the first step should be patiently listening to them, and not passing a judgement. You should make them talk freely about the problem and point out when you find something problametic, so that they explain that in detail.

If you listen to them carefully, many times they themselves would express the wish for seeing someone who could understand them. This is their subconscious desire for someone’s help to seek external help to bring their psychological affairs in order. All you need to take this divert their desire to its fulfillment by introducing the counsellor as someone they can trust. Try bringing the counsellor by saying something like ‘I think a friend of mine could help you. Want to meet him?’. If they say no to this, don’t stress on this point and move on to step number two.

2. Englighten them

Thanks to the InternetThanks to the Internet, knowledge about mental health issues is more readily available than it ever was. So, if you can’t convince them directly, do so by appealing to their intellect. Once again, the fact that they trust you is very important. You can try to educate them indirectly using movies, books, and documentaries etc. as your source.

For example, on YouTube there are plenty of channels like ‘The School of Life’ and ‘Ted Ed’ that beautifully explain mental health issues in a very interactive way. Most of their descriptions consist of animated videos, which are suitable for people of every age. You can send your loved ones links to such videos, or you could simply share something similar with them that you find online. Once they better understand their problem, they would take your suggestions more seriously. Just make sure that you don’t make your intentions too clear by pestering them with links and advices. However, in case, even educating them doesn’t help, you need to take a stricter approach.

3. Take strong action

relationship issuesIn many types of relationships, we can convince the person by acting in an authoritarian way or by persuaing them by appealing to their emotions. Although at times times this approach works better than the above two measures, you should keep it as a last resort.

For example, if its your spouse who loves you, show them how all this is negatively affecting your relationship and tell them that you won’t talk to them unless they seek professional help. On the other hand, if it your teenage child that’s dependent on you, don’t give them pocket money unless they accompany you to see a counsellor. Remember, their lives are more important than any discomort that you might make them go through with your strict behaviour.

Final Words

Before you follow any of these instructions, just make sure that you find a trustable counsellor near you. If you don’t know any, ask others for suggsetions, check reviews online, or have a trial and error approach. Above all, make sure that you don’t let all this affect your own mental health.

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