Very often, married women find themselves fantasising about some other man, psychologists say it’s normal
Recent research has shown that around 55 per cent of married women do fantasise about men who are not their husbands. Popular choices for these sex fantasies include: Film stars, Sportsmen, Singers and TV personalities. Ruchika (32), a marketing executive has been married for the last five years and is sure to be totally in love with her husband. However, there seems to be a problem recently.
“I have always thought that my marriage was pretty happy. But now it is threatened by sexual fantasies which include a famous sportsman,”
Forget celebrities, very often, women find themselves dreaming during intercourse about some man who lives down the road, or whom they met some place during the day. Books have been written about women’s sexual fantasies. And it is well known that fantasy can help a woman have an orgasm. Sexologists say there is really no harm in such fantasy – provided you do not let it get out of hand. New York based Dr. Joyce Brothers says,
“It might relieve some of your guilt to know that many happily married individuals who have no thought or intention of ever betraying their spouse have sexual fantasies about someone other than their spouse.”
Agrees Trishala (40), an architect, who is married for 11 years,
“I never have my husband in my fantasies. It would not be a fantasy at all if he is in it but I know that fantasies are all I can have and that’s the fun part of it. You could do anything, go anywhere with anyone you chose to be with. I have absolutely no intention to go beyond that and if men can have their erotic fantasies why can’t women have their share too?”
5 reasons why is it okay to have sexual fantasies:
1.It is both pleasurable and a safe emotional outlet
2.They are a legitimate way to add variety to your sex life
3.You have total control and freedom over you imagination
4.Women who fantasize have more orgasms during sex than those who refrain from fantasizing
5.Therapists consider it unhealthy for individuals to not have sexual fantasies.
Dr. Brother however cautions,
“If you do decide to share your fantasies with your spouse, the two of you need to set guidelines and honour each other’s limits.”
PS: Some names have been changed for privacy reasons