Wines for a bum

bum wioneWhenever we talk of wines we think of the sophisticated Classics, but that neglects the choice of a commoner to have an ardor for this indulgence. The only problem lies in actually affording it, but thanks to the street wines that have given this opportunity to the common man. In relation to this Bum, a website dedicated to the economical wines, presents a review of five street wines that includes Cisco, MD 20/20, Night Train, Thunderbird and Wild Irish Rose.

Cisco goes for the second position with the second best tasting of the top five bum wines, second in terms of intensity and the product manufactured by the second largest wine company Canandaigua Wine Co., NY and Naples, NY. The drink is available in various flavors in bottles of 375 mL and 750mL sizes and is associated with one color RED and fermented from citrus wine and grapes with artificial color and flavor. A report in Bum wines shows that:

In 1991, Cisco’s tendency to cause a temporary form of inebriated insanity led the Federal Trade Commission to require its bottlers to print a warning on the label. The FTC also forced them to drop their marketing slogan, “Takes You by Surprise,” even though it was entirely accurate.

MD 20/20 or Mad Dog 20/20 by 20/20 wine company in Westfield, New York, stands for Mogen David and is supposed to be the best tasting Bum wine with a “numbing effect”, coating your palate with foam and distinct Red Grape and Blueberry flavors. Night Train made by E&J Gallo Winery, in Modesto, CA, is enough to make you feel drowsy, even though it says it is 0.5 percent less in volume. Thunderbird is also made by E&J Gallo Winery, in Modesto, CA, and is supposed to smell the foulest of the three. This drink is supposed to be the cheapest in terms of price as well a quality. The Warning on the bottle shows:

This light yellow liquid turns your lips and mouth black! A mysterious chemical reaction similar to disappearing-reappearing ink makes you look like you’ve been chewing on hearty clumps of charcoal.

Last but not the least Wild Irish rose is a poison for the bums and a report in the review says:

This foul beverage is a conspiracy by the republicans to kill the homeless.

The drink available in 750ml and 350ml is said to drive you crazy and mind you it is the strongest of all the bum wines. Field reporter “Greyham” says:

Here is Wild I’s devastating new addition, “Wild Fruit with Ginseng”. I’ll be honest with you: the normal Wild I has turned into some sort of fierce energy drink gone wrong mixed with the original to create a bumworthy migraine-inducing concoction. After that relatively small bottle, I didn’t piss until the next evening despite drinking copious amounts of water. There is DEFINITELY something in this stuff that dehydrates you…possibly the “ginseng” or whatever it is that they added to this already foul stuff.

The wine reviews are mostly based on bold fruit based wines, which I am sure is the taste of the common man. These wines are cheap but can lso be added to the wine collection of those who prefer to have wines in from the bold-intense wine bouquet.

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