If you’re a bit squeamish, or easily offended then you might want to skip this article today, but I feel it needs telling since this is a “confessional” blog.
I went to Toronto today for a meeting with a guy to buy a couple of web-sites, (More on this tomorrow!) and stopped at a restaurant along the way for lunch.
After ordering a coffee I went down to the washroom, and since I have a sore hip due to a premature onslaught of arthritis, I sat in a stall to pee instead of standing at the urinal.
Everything was fine at first!.
I was sitting there with my pants down around my ankles, when I heard a strange splashing sound that you don’t normally hear when you’re going to the can.
LET’S STOP RIGHT THERE FOR A MOMENT! Do you ever have that feeling where you know something’s not right, and you don’t know what it is, and the only thing you know for sure is that it can’t be good?
Well that’s the feeling I had kids!
(Here is where we get to the delicate part!)
It seems that when I uh…… peed, instead of going down into the bowl, it went straight and shot out between the top of the bowl and the bottom of the seat, did a graceful arch and splashed right into the crotch of my pants, which were laying on the floor between my ankles.
Hence that strange, unfamiliar splashing sound I heard!
Cursing and swearing I dried off my pants the best I could and went out to eat my lunch, only to discover at the end of the meal that I had also dropped a big glob of gravy right down the front of my nice white shirt.
So there I was folks, all set to go to an important business meeting, in a foul mood and thoroughly pissed and stained!
Glad the meeting went better than lunch did…., just hope they didn’t notice the smell!!
Allan W Janssen is the author of the book The Plain Truth About God (What the mainstream religions don’t want you to know……!) and is available as an E-Book H E R E! and H E R E! And as a paperback H E R E ! and H E R E !
Visit the blog “Perspective” at http://allans-perspective.blogspot.com