APPEAL/APOLOGY
Let me tender my apology, at the very onset, to enlightened members of the Instablogs community, especially the female readers. I could have roped in a more reader-friendly title than such a shocking heading. However, any attempts to do so would have defeated the very purpose of writing such a shocking piece. In my eyes, only hypocrites would call it vulgar and naturally bring in use the trash button. But even if they decide to use the trash button, I would like them to read the article and try to be at the par with the essence of the whole article.
The people around us are day and night bombarding the ear drums with such shocking epithets and we have, apparently, stopped treating them as offending. If that’s the case then I think there is no point in raising hue and cry about article being objectionable and crude. But the sad reality is that it really hurts when one hears such epithets. So what’s the motive? To make it clear that let’s not make abuses part and parcel of routine conversations.
It’s indeed a very shocking experience if someone hurls it at you all of a sudden,leaving you taken aback. If we can use better phrases then why we have made abuses part of our conversations? And if one is not ashamed of using abuses in conversations, I don’t think one should find anything objectionable in reading them on screen.
Another reason why I have written this article is that I love to bring darker aspects of life in open. Let’s get realistic and be not ashamed in reading what we have become used to in our daily lives! Today I either laugh loud or pretend that I have not heard it at all when I come to have unusual interaction with them but I don’t think that’s going to bring any qualitative changes in our mannerism!
My idea of writing this article first hit the mind some years back when I was in Delhi. I came to anticipate these modern mantras very often there. Mind you not only the commoners were using but also the high and mighty were not behind in uttering them proving that power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Even the teenage girls and boys let fly with tirade of abuses on small pretexts.
In the evenings we used to walk around PVR situated close to JNU. One gentleman there inquired about Photostat shop. On not being able to locate one he busted out: “Behen Chod Sirf Cigarette Aur Beeri Ki Dukan Hi Delhi Mein Hai Kya? Behen Chod Ek Din Sale Sab Marenge”. He was not all wrong. I could see teenage girls and boys smoking and there were beer bottles scattered around all along the path.
If you happen to ride aboard a DTC bus there you would be surrounded by nothing else but choicest abuses. “Behen Chod Ticket Nahi Lega Kya “or “Behan Chod Chal Utar Tera Stoppage Aa Gaya Hai”. Interestingly, one American who was traveling with me could not resist himself from asking me what these words really mean? He opened his small notebook, wherein he seemed to have jotted down these abuses. I gave a smile and told him that these are foul words.
I had similar experiences when I was in Mumbai. A boy hardly in his teens from a well-to-do family was walking waywardly on a busy street. Obviously, he was drunk. He seemed to have a bitter fight with her girl-friend studying in class seventh! –“Behen Chod Mere Saath Nahi Chalegi. Kutiya Kahi Ki! Khud Dus Logo Ke Saath Ghumti Hai, Tab Kuch Nahi Jata.”
I don’t know what’s happening in the Western world but it’s quite clear that there too foul words have become integral part of their routine conversation. I would like to quote a certain excerpt from a dialogue, which took place on a prominent site that deals with publication of poems and short stories. I am also one of its prominent contributors. The best thing of this whole conversation is that it has taken place between two best friends and that too in a lighter vain.
Here is the excerpt: “You fucking idiot! Tread carefully motherfucker, I can find you and I will not be nice, pray to your imaginary friend now asshole. AIDS? What the fuck do you know? You can only get that from people who are infected with the HIV and without a condom, you fucking idiot. Primitive minded motherfucker. Go swing out of a tree monkey.” (It’s an unedited version of the comment.)
Anyway, I must tell what’s happening in India instead of revealing the darker sides of Western world. Today we are hell-bent on improving the face of Indian police. I don’t know when they are going to change? I don’t know how many of us have encountered Policewallah speaking in a friendly way? He is one of the most dreaded species on earth.
On very small pretexts, you will find him using foul words. They never miss an opportunity to turn you into a caricature. A friend of mine was returning from a late-night party with his sister. A policeman on the beat asked him to stop. The Policeman went closer them and asked,” Where are you roaming with this Laundiya (Girl)? ”You expect something better from a lady police officer. But even their mannerism is devoid of good elements. They too find nothing wrong in using foul words. Look how are they dealing with group of innocent girls brought to book for their alleged involvement in prostitution racket: “ Kutiya Dhanda Karti Hai Aur Yeha Aakar Drama Kar Rahi Hai.
”Well, one expects something better from women officials. But they seem to be setting new standards of degradation! The lives of Policemen hover around foul words and therefore there are endless tales related with their intimate bond with abuses. Recently, some eminent sports persons in Varanasi were knocked down and handed roughly by the petty constables with choicest abuses.
Well, I can say that fast-paced life of ours has wrecked our nerves, to an extent that we have no control over our mouths. As a lawyer when I first entered in the premises of Allahabad High Court, it felt really great. Indeed, it’s a great place. However, I came to notice that almost all the lawyers enjoyed close proximity with foul words.
I came to notice that senior lawyers usually handled their juniors very roughly. Being a rebel of some sort, I refused to be part of this chain of events which my friend tell that it’s essential to face such trials and tribulations to turn into a more practical guy. My other colleagues told me that they (read senior lawyers) are reshaping your tendencies in order to overcome rough moments with ease during the proceedings.
However, I ignored their advice. But what they said had an element of truth. If you have witnessed proceedings in divorce related cases, you would come to notice that words like “Kutiya”, “ Chinar”, “Randi” fly thick and fast from both the sides right in front of the Me Lord !!!
Looking this issue from a different perspective, I think that’s why women in our villages during marriage ceremony hurl abuses at the groom’s family when they come to have food. Sometimes they are used as tools to create intimacy, to create familiarity. I have heard that abuses hurled by saints are considered to some form of blessing.
Even the prominent Hindi writers and poets are not ashamed in hurling choicest abuses whenever possible. That’s why I feel pretty uncomfortable in their company. But that’s something a natural affair for them. Even prominent Muslim writers like Tasleema Nasreen, Ismat Chugtai and Saadat Hasan Manto have frequently used foul words.
But that cannot be used an excuse to provide an exalted position to abuse or Gaali in our lives. Let’s come to respect the sense and sensibilities of each other. No doubt it’s very hard to rise above foul words during tense moments but we can certainly avoid making them part of our routine conversations. And some day we will learn to say the unpleasant things in a refined language. There is no dearth of pleasant words in dictionary. Let’s learn to use them to convey both our good and bad feelings. If that’s not possible let us use them in rarest of rare times.
